Granular Ruminations III: Processed Corn Stinks

There is something particularly unpleasant about the smell of microwavable popcorn and corn chips; they really smell like dirty socks and diapers, respectively. I've had to put up with this smell for several years while working in the United States and Canada. Recently, I found that I was not alone in my disdain for the smell of microwaved popcorn: someone at work nuked grits with the office door open, causing our neighbours across the hall to complain that they were close to suffocating. (Of course, I don't find the smell of cigarette smoke that their employees inundate us with any better.) To add insult to injury, one day my beloved co-workers prepared microwavable popcorn with cheese flavouring. Later that day, I received the following email:

As-salaamu alaykum Mr. Abu Fluffy:

I just entered the other office right now, your office, and you are right the smell of the office stinks just like old socks. So on behalf of me and Hiraganasan, we would like to apologise for the smell.

Ps. The popcorn isn’t ours even! But we volunteered to make it :(

Alhamdulillah, they've stopped making microwaved popcorn since that day, at least when I'm around.